So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize