Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
