I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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