So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
My liver just broke up with me...
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
