Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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