I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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