Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
