His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Randomize
