I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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