I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
