She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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