Me. At least after what I've been through.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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