We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
