sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
And the cops told us we were all naked.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
