He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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