called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Randomize
