i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
