I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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