There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
