Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
