Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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