Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
