Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
