I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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