I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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