We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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