I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
