Cold hands, warm shart.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
