i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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