So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I can't turn off my feet"
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
