have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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