i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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