Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
