I wannas sexs uuuuu
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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