i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
