it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
