Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
