gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
