I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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