The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
