Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
