There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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