Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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