I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
