I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
