i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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