just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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