I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
