Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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