why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
